Tag: #singlemom #dating #singlewomen

Christian Author Spotlight: Tonia Shalel

Now; how many single women out there are waiting on their Boaz? Do you know what you have to do while your waiting? Have you received instructions, clarity; or directions? How would you feel if there was a book that was written that would give you some insight into what to do; while you wait?

First of all; you may want to know who the author is; right?

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Let’s find out:

Tonia Shalel is first and foremost a disciple of Jesus Christ. She is a best-selling author, life coach and speaker. She is the founder of Ruth and Boaz in the Meantime Ministries and is passionate about Christians discovering and walking in their purpose.
Having been blessed with the spiritual gift of encouragement in all of her career choices (teaching, Human Resources) she has mentored many people that the Lord has called her to walk with. Tonia’s purpose in life is to raise her daughter in the fear of the Lord and to model what an authentic relationship with Jesus looks like.

She is raising a future Proverbs 31 woman and takes that assignment very seriously. Additionally, her second purpose in life is to encourage Christian singles to passionately pursue their Kingdom assignment from the Lord.

She holds a Bachelor’s degree in Education from State University of New York, College at Old Westbury, a Master’s degree in Communication Studies from California State University, Los Angeles, an HR Management certificate from The University of California, Irvine and holds a Life Coach certification from Life Coach Training Institute, accredited by the International Association of Certified Coaches.

So, now that we know more about the author; let’s find out why she wrote this book; in her own words:
The Lord laid it on my heart to begin writing this book shortly after My Beauty for Ashes was released.  As a woman of God who is preparing for God ordained marriage I wanted to share with other single Christian women my process. There were specific steps the Lord told me to take in order to prepare for my husband and in my book I share these tips with the reader.  (did you see that? Tonia is sharing her instructions that she received from God!) We can’t be out of order ladies; we have to listen to Our Heavenly Father and He will provide instructions! And many times it will be spoken through someone else!


 
Tonia has written this book specifically for:  
 
Single Christian women who desire a God-ordained marriage.
 
Here is a brief description of the book;  Boaz, The Promise and The Wait:
 
Waiting on God can sometimes feel like forever for the single Christian woman. In Boaz, the Promise and the Wait, Tonia takes the reader through the necessary steps when waiting on God. Through biblical principles, she will empower you to pursue purpose and heal your heart while preparing for your God-ordained husband.
To buy Tonia’s Book; check out http://www.amazon.com
I will add this as well; I happen to have a copy of this book! Thank you Tonia! I happen to be a Single Christian Woman Waiting on God! And; let me tell you the “wait” does feel like forever; but, I do know that there is no-one in this world that can bless us like God can! So, I wait; and I love reading books like Tonia’s for encouragement, inspiration and reminders that we have work to do while we wait! 
This is an excerpt that I love from the book: “Woman of God, you must heal in order to be whole and ready for your husband”. Tonia Shalel
boaz
© 2018 Tamara McCarthy Enterprises used with permission (Tonia Shalel) Christian Author Spotlight
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Single Mom Salute on Mother’s Day

Happy Mother's Day!Single MomKeep Moving Forward

With Mother’s Day fast approaching I thought I would take out sometime to salute my fellow Single Mom’s and share some of my stories as I go through this journey. If you are a Single Mom then you know that the struggle is real and can very well be a challenge at times; but we press on and know that it won’t last forever! While this day is supposed to be a happy day of celebration I want to highlight somethings that we as Single Moms have to endure on a daily basis; so when you encounter a Single Mom just know that even though she may have a smile on her face, she is maybe hurting on the inside.

We are just 1 person but may have to juggle other roles at times!

Do anyone of you remember when they came out with Fathers Day Cards for Single Moms and people went ballistic! Lol the nerve right; are they in the household helping with the child(ren)? No, they aren’t but everyone has their opinion and 2 cents to throw in when it doesn’t concern them. They aren’t the one that has to miss work (and miss out on pay) when your kid is sick, or has a teacher conference at school. They also aren’t the one that has to do their best to keep a roof over their head, put clothes on their back, shoes on their feet, food in their mouth; all while only bringing in the income of 1 person! People are so quick to judge and kick you while you are down but don’t fully know or care what you have to endure on a daily basis!

Where is this village that I keep hearing about?

Many of us Single Moms don’t have this village that society says it takes to raise a kid! There are no men in the family to step up as father figures; there are no mentors at school that are willing to step in and spend time with your boys to help steer them in the right direction, heck there aren’t even any in the church! I asked a young pastor a few years back if he would like to mentor my boys and he kindly told me to call someone else!

I’m not a fighter but for my children; I will.

Not too long ago my teenage son went to take out the trash and came back home to tell me; that he had an altercation with the maintenance guy that cursed at him for no reason and got in his face! Me being his mother I had to go and approach the situation to see what transpired. As I walked down to where the incident happened my heart was racing and I began to talk to God; Lord you know I’m just a woman a single mom I’m not that big but I have to protect my son, his father isn’t around but I ask you please go before me and prepare this encounter because I don’t know what or who I’m about to face!

As I got closer I saw the maintenance guy and asked was he the only one out there and had he cursed at my son; his facial expression quickly changed from smug to scared and he said yes but he was wrong and it would never happen again. He was upset due to the dumpster being filled and people were placing the trash on the ground and he had to pick it up, I don’t him that wasn’t my sons fault and we weren’t the only ones that lived there and why he decided to pick on a child! These are the types of situations we as Single Moms have to endure. The struggle is way to real.

We really don’t want to be Single; But….

Having the desire to date but the pot being half full or empty. See when you have kids many guys don’t look at you as worthy! They look as you as a liability and quite frankly a waste of their time! Now don’t get me wrong lots of Single Moms get dates but many times that as far as it goes; a date and a nightcap, who wants that for the rest of their lives! We are still women and deserve the best and yes a husband not just some pit stop!

So the next time you encounter a Single Mom give her some words of encouragement, inspiration, hey even some motivation; we like all of those things and can use them to pick ourselves up when this thing called life gets us down. See being a Mom is really awesome and I’m sure none of us will trade it for anything in the world; but as a Single Mom it can be far more challenging and many times a very lonely journey. To all my Single Moms Keep Your Head Up…..

Single Mom Are You Ready to Date?

Mommy, are you ready to date-

Single Mom: Are You Ready?

As a woman you will always have the desire to date; but as a single mom it can sometimes be a challenge. How will your kids react? Will the guys that you seek or seek you be okay with you having kids? Most importantly you want to ask yourself the question; Single Mom are you ready to date? The answer will be different for each woman that chooses to answer the question due to their personal beliefs and choices. For me making the decision back in 2009 to give my life back to God; I had to figure out what that meant and what changes I had to make, I couldn’t do that and be in the dating world.

Single Woman:

When you are single without children you don’t have little eyes and ears to worry about; but there are many single women that also take an hiatus from the world of dating because the pot isn’t always full with potential candidates to be honest. Many women like a variety to choose from, and even though I have been on the sidelines for sometime; I still have eyes and ears  and the streets be talking! If you are a young woman with morals and standards most of the time that isn’t going to get you anywhere.

Who Are You?

When you don’t know who you are and what you want that will get you exactly that; a guy that doesn’t know what he wants and has no idea who he is! He isn’t going to tell you the truth because he doesn’t know the truth; he is simply having fun and that means sleeping with whomever will give him the time of day! But when you take the time to sit down and think about what you want and figure out who you are; then these types of guys can no longer get any ear time and no play time because they are no longer an option.

So if you are a Single Mom these are the questions you need to ask yourself:

  1. Am I ready to date?
  2. Are my kids ready for me to date?
  3. Do I know who I am?
  4. Do I know what I want?
  5. Am I willing to lower my standards to be in a Relationship?
  6. Do I have any standards?

After answering these questions I hope that you have found the answer to the question posed “Single Mom Are You Ready to Date?”; many of us just jump out there without a plan of action. From what I hear the dating world isn’t what it used to be; you have to come ready and that means knowing who you are and what you want!