#SpiritualSundays: When the Only Way to Go is Up…

When I tell you 2018 has been a crazy year; please believe me. Past years haven’t been all that peachy either and as a Christian you often ask God; “why Lord, when will it get better?”

Day after day, month after month; you get a glimpse of hope here and there; but then you get sidelined once again! You often wonder is it something I’m doing wrong or not doing at all? Is something from my past coming back to bite me or somehow cause this dry and weary season? Please forgive me Lord; please!

I know a lot of you can relate and feel where I’m coming from; all of us don’t get to experience the comfy, gushy life all the time. There are some of us that are taken through the wilderness, those fiery dungeons and those murky waters; and all while going through this have to have that smile on our face and pep in our step!

For some, it’s not an easy task and we lash out instead of looking up! We lash out on those closest to us and even those that have no clue as to what we are dealing with; some of us feel like it’s just too much and just end it all…

As a Christian we are taught or believe that God is our provider: “I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth. He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is thy keeper: the Lord is thy shade upon thy right hand. The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul. The Lord shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.” Psalms 121:1-8 (KJV)

I’m here to tell you that we’ve been down far too long; we can’t get any lower! The only way from here; is Up! Yes, it’s been hard and yes we have been stretched and looked over! But, the only way to go now; is Up!

You can have all the degrees there is to get and still not breaking even! You have years upon years of experience and they still want to offer you chump change! You can easily be a team lead, supervisor, manager; etc but they still won’t recognize, acknowledge or even grant you an interview!

And all while experiencing this you have people in your life that don’t believe in you! Don’t believe that you’re doing your absolute best! They come in and kick you down instead of lifting you up! They walk away as if you never meant anything to them; you stood by them in their time of need and now their nowhere to be found!

I get it; believe me I do! I am writing this from experience and heart ache but you know what gets me through? Trusting and believing in the one that created me!! Our Heavenly Father! Our Alpha and Omega!! Do you know Him?

When everyone else walked away and left me to pick up the pieces on my own; God was right there! Cheering me on and giving me the strength to endure! The struggle is very real but, I’m in it to win it!!

We at least not me; weren’t told that a Christian life would be easy; yes we have this loving Father; but, we also have the enemy who gets insanely upset when you choose a better more fulfilling life! He isn’t going to willingly let you go; you have to break free and that will mean some hard, stressful times ahead!

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9 (NIV)

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6 (NIV)

So, what do you choose??

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/author_tamaramccarthy

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself. 

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life! 

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated! 

From the Desk of a Single Mom: Where is the Unity? Sisterhood Chronicles

Many times in life; you will have to be the one that has to speak the unpopular! Social media paints a picture that all is well; and it doesn’t always show the true picture.

And then, we also have to remember that our situation isn’t the same for others in the world. While we may have some good relationships with other women; it doesn’t mean the person standing next to you; can relate! The world and the people in it; aren’t perfect.

I wanted to share something that I sent to my email list subscribers yesterday:

How are you doing?

Can we chat for just a moment? When did we as women get to the place of not loving our fellow sisters? As I was scrolling through social media the other day. I came across a story of two teen girls whose life was shattered; in a matter of minutes! One was dead and the other was in jail. Why? Because they were fighting over a boy!

So, I ask again; when did we get here? When was it okay for us as young ladies and grown women to act and respond this way? It just doesn’t start there; when did we get so comfortable putting another women down or talk about her; instead of lifting her up? Offering our assistance; when she needs it!

So many of us are afraid that by helping others; we will somehow be in lack! That is not of God! God doesn’t promote hate, jealously or strife! But, I know who does! When did we begin to hate or stop talking to each other; simply because another women has a problem with someone? What happened to being a mediator and getting down to the root cause of the problem? Because, it is something more going on; that women don’t want to talk about! 

I’m very passionate about sisterhood and women forming lasting friendships… Why? I have throughout my lifetime been on the receiving end of what I speak about! As a young girl; I’ve had classmates attempt to jump me, I’ve had them spread false rumors about me, I’ve been called all kinds of names by them; and even in my adult life much of the same has occurred. 

In 2015, when God told me it was time for me to find my voice; I really didn’t want to start speaking up; but I am starting to see now that it’s necessary and needed. Too many of us stay silent and only speak about those things that serve us….

If you’re reading this; I thank you for taking out the time. We can change the outcome; one person at a time!

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/author_tamaramccarthy

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

Inner Circle: Who Is In Yours?

Godly Relationships….Godly Community…..Godly Connections…..

Ask yourself:

Do you have them? Do you fit in with them? Do you inspire them?

What do your relationships look like?

Do you have community that you can count on? Who can you call when you are in trouble?

What kind of friend are you? This is probably the most important question you can ask yourself; when it comes to relationships! So many are seeking relationships-friendships; but lack everything they are seeking in another!

Let’s take a look at some biblical journeys of Godly relationships-friendships to get a feel of what they look like……

Daniel Represents:

“Then the king gave Daniel high honors and many great gifts, and made him ruler over the whole province of Babylon and chief prefect over all the wise men of Babylon. Daniel made a request of the king, and he appointed Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego over the affairs of the province of Babylon. But Daniel remained at the king’s court.” Daniel 2:48-49 (ESV)

Ask yourself:

Do you have Godly Relationships that when they are promoted; they don’t forgot about you and how you held them down? When Daniel went in to interpret the King’s Dream who did he ask to petition God? Do you have friends that will aid you in getting your prayers answered?

Ruth takes a stand:

“But Ruth said, “Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you.” And when Naomi saw that she was determined to go with her, she said no more.” Ruth 1:16-18 (ESV)

The story of Ruth shows us a perfect example of a Godly Relationship-Community-Connections…..Not only did she desire to not return to her people; her previous life! She got the ultimate blessing in the end!

Ask yourself:

Do you allow people to see the real you or the mask?

Do you allow people to see you broken and hurt?

Do you allow people to speak into your life?

Do you allow others to help mold you into your best self?

Friendship-Relationships shouldn’t be created as a one-way street! So many people are focused on what they will get out of a relationship; they forget to figure out what they bring to the table!

When Jesus set out to complete his mission; he knew he would need others to assist him. Spreading the word of God isn’t an easy task because you will always have those that rebel. Jesus knew he needed a team to walk along side of him and those He could trust when He wasn’t around to still spread the good news!

But guess what? It wasn’t a one-way relationship! Yes, the disciples gave up much to walk with Jesus; but look at what they gained for being part of His Inner Circle!

Ask yourself:

Do you have what it takes to be part of Godly Relationships-Community?

Are you willing to remove the mask and show your real-true self?

Are you willing to put aside what no longer serves you?

Can you commit to helping others succeed in life; without personal gain?

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/kingdomgals

Join my Facebook group: https://m.facebook.com/groups/274547549700921

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

Kingdom Gals: Are You Your Sister’s Keeper?

women friends

I was scheduled to write on a different subject today but; this subject was heavy on my heart. I am just a push over for women no matter the race or background; to be on one accord! And when it appears that we’re starting to slip back into old territoryI can’t be one of those that just sit on the sidelines and let it go down!

Does anyone really know what the meaning of sisterhood is? Does anyone really care? Some of us use it to our advantage when we have events or something going on in our lives; which isn’t right! Some of us use it to our advantage when it aids us no matter the situation! But some of us look forward to it all year round; no matter what and are genuine about it! 🙋🏽

Sisterhood defined from the Merriam Webster Dictionary:

1a : “the state of being a sister
b sisterly relationship
2a community or society of sistersespecially a society of women in a religious order
3the solidarity of women based on shared conditions, experiences, or concerns”
friends_1

What does sisterhood mean to you?

Are you one that uses it to your advantage?

Are you one that looks forward to connecting with other women and creating a bond, relationship, or friendship?

Do you love yourself? Why do I ask? In order to love others; you have to first love yourself?

Do we all know that our #1 enemy; comes to steal, kill and destroy? Do we all know that he is the author of confusion? Do we all know that he thrives when we are at odds?

He doesn’t want us on one accord! He laughs at us every time we get at odds over the stupidest stuff!

1. She looked at me wrong.

2. She told someone this about me.

3. She looked at my boyfriend/husband.

4. She rolled her eyes at me.

5. She didn’t come to my event.

6. She didn’t loan me the money.

7. She borrowed something and never gave it back.

8. She misunderstood what I said.

9. She stole my idea.

10. She is friends with people I don’t like.

The list can go on; but are these valid reasons to be at odds with another woman, sister, friend, or daughter?

Do you remember when Jesus was betrayed by one of his disciples? (Read Luke 22 and Mark 16:7) The very person who was a friend? Sold him out for a few gold coins? When Jesus was resurrected from the dead; who did He ask for?

Did Jesus hold a grudge? Why should you hold a grudge or have a problem with the next woman? You don’t have to be bosom buddies if there is clearly a problem; but at least be able to talk it out and come to an understanding. We all have different personalities and none of us are perfect! And some of our mindsets are a little off but; we have to at least make the effort!

friends

As Christian Women we have to set the standard; we have to set the stage. We have to represent Our Heavenly Father to the fullest! We have to look like we are His children and act like we belong to Him.

Check out this article from Huffington Post: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/sophia-a-nelson/what-is-sisterhood-really_b_4410051.html

References:

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/sisterhood

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/kingdomgals

Join my Facebook group: https://m.facebook.com/groups/274547549700921

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

#SpiritualSundays: Your Steps Are Ordered…..

“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps”. Proverbs 16:9 (NIV)

You know I didn’t have anything planned to write about today; and then I read this scripture! Wow, isn’t that amazing? I know I was amazed!

Does it make you wonder how it would apply to other things as well? You are getting ready to go hang out with friends and all of a sudden; they call and cancel on you. You got this amazing interview lined up; for what you think, is the perfect job and they send you a letter the day before saying: we have decided to go with someone more qualified!

How would that make you feel? Either situation at face value may suck and put you in a funk; but, look at it differently. Read that scripture again but this time more slowly and meditate on its every word. “In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps”. Proverbs 16:9

You were almost ready; on your way out the door but God had something else in mind for you! You called all your friends and family and told them about this interview, the company and all the money you would be making; but God has other plans for you!

Better is coming! The things that we hope and pray for can be our best in our minds but God can always go Higher, Bigger; and Better.

How do you feel when these type of situations take place? Do you talk about your friend to someone else? “Girl, I can’t believe she did me like that; I was all ready on my way out the door!” Dude, that man was talking about this party all week and all of a sudden; he gonna call and cancel on me? I wasn’t dressed yet but I was about to be!”

Sound familiar? After reading and meditating on that scripture; do you feel any different? Will you think differently next time? I will assure you there will be a next time! Learn the lesson now and change your reaction to it!

Have you ever heard that saying “you learn something new everyday?” Well I’m here to tell you that is a true saying!

What I learned yesterday; but didn’t catch it until this morning! Is that God is always blessing us! It may not look or feel like a blessing at that moment but as you take the time and internalize it and think on it; you will catch the revelation.

We don’t know what God was blocking when he cancels out our plans. He could be saving our lives! Saving us from some type of hurt or pain! When you look at it this way; you change your thinking, your mindset, the outcome and your reaction to the situation and just thank him!

Thank you Lord for stepping in all those situations that we think are good but you see it as bad! Thank you for that phone call or letter that may seem like a negative but you turned it into a positive!

If you liked this blog post; check out my many others on my website. http://www.tamaramccarthyenterprises.com

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/kingdomgals

Ladies, Join my Facebook group: https://m.facebook.com/groups/274547549700921

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

Special Edition: The Sex Talk

Are you a parent?

Have you had the sex talk with your child or children?

How did it go? Did you find out anything you weren’t aware of? Were they already sexually active? Did they already have birth control (girls) Did they already have condoms on hand (girls and boys)?

If you haven’t had the sex talk with them; who do you expect to teach them or speak with them about it? The streets? Society? School? Peers? Absentee Parent?

Do you believe that when you have the talk with them; they will listen to what you have told them? Let’s face it our kids aren’t perfect and neither were we; but you want to prepare them for the outside world and all that it involves!

I never got the talk from my parents and I can say I wish they would’ve prepared me for that part of my life! I remember my mom telling me to not have a boyfriend until I was 18 with no other explanation. As a young girl I didn’t know what to expect and she just left me hanging. Okay you said don’t have a boyfriend until I’m 18; why not? We as parents have to speak up and tell our kids what happens when you go down that road.

1. You can get pregnant! You can get someone pregnant!

2. Date rape!

3. Domestic violence!

4. Sexually transmitted diseases!

5. Reputation!

The list goes on and on but you get the picture!

Even though I didn’t get the talk from my parents I didn’t want to repeat that cycle! I decided early on that I would have the talk with my kids and let them know what they were up against! I didn’t want them to go down the same roads I had traveled! But, even though you have that talk your kids may still stray because of their surroundings and the friends they have; etc. With all the technology, we have nowadays we as parents; also have to tell them how not to use that in a negative aspect as well! Sending x-rated pics, videos and messages! That can definitely land them in big trouble!

All we can really do is lay the foundation, plant those seeds and pray they listen, understand and do what’s right.

And if they happen to go down that road and the outcome isn’t positive then we have to acknowledge what they’ve done and help them learn from it!

So many young kids are having kids and they have no sense of direction or what to expect! So many young boys leave these young ladies to do it all on their own and it’s not right!

Parents if your son gets a young girl pregnant he needs to accept his responsibility! He was part of the problem; he needs to be a part of the solution!

The way I told my boys and my daughter; “you see how I’ve struggled to provide for y’all; you don’t want to repeat this cycle! Don’t be like me; be better than me!”.

It start with us! If not us then who?

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/kingdomgals

Join my Facebook group: https://m.facebook.com/groups/274547549700921

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

Christian Author Spotlight: Chantea M. Williams

Who is Chantea M. Williams?

Chantea M. Williams is a chef, author, speaker and mentor, who loves encouraging the people of God to become greater through the word of God. Through her gifts, God created the Greater Working Women Ministries. They strive to encourage, empower and equip women from all walks of life to live out their God given purpose with holy boldness. Sign up for the monthly newsletter at http://www.greaterwomen.com for upcoming events. For booking information email info@greaterwomen.com.

Why I wrote the book:

To share my story and others as a teen/young mother in order to help others.

Target Audience:

Young mothers ages 13-21

Book Description:

This anthology is a compilation of enthralling women who are sharing their evocative stories of experiencing motherhood for the very first time. From homelessness, rape, abuse and looking for love in all the wrong places, these women were determined not to allow their circumstances to determine their destinies. They defied the odds against them and went from a statistic to a SUCCESS! The imagery will propel you to feel, believe and declare, “I AM STILL SOMEBODY!” There’s A Jewel In You was written to encourage, empower and equip young mothers for greater. It takes a JEWEL to see a JEWEL and that’s what we see in you.

Inspirational Message:

No matter what you have gone through in life, Giving Up Is Never An Option! You can go from a statistic to a success if you believe in yourself despite your circumstances. You were already created with greatness on the inside of you. Speak Greater, Live Greater, Be Greater!

“Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ”. (Philippians 1:6)

©️2018 Tamara McCarthy Enterprises used with permission Chantea M. Williams (Christian Author Spotlight)