Are You Fit For The Kingdom? #spiritualsundays

Mark 8:34

“Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” NIV

Have you denied yourself today? Have you taken up your cross and followed Him; on the daily? This has to be done on a daily basis!! We can’t pick it up one day and put it down the next! We can’t deny ourselves today and not do it tomorrow! Okay, yes we are human but we as a follower of Christ; have to learn how to do better! One day do this and the next day; do more so it gets a little better until it becomes a habit! Pray today for 5 minutes and do that continually for a week and then the following week; move up to 10 minutes.

If something in your life is requiring some attention and you’re just praying about it; and you’re not getting the required results! Then prayer and fasting should be the next step; but guess what you will have to deny yourself! You can’t say that food is more important than your prayers being answered! Is fried food going to disappear tomorrow? Is ice cream going to be extinct; next week? You don’t have to do a 21 day fast to get results; you can do 7 days and still get your answers, clarity, direction, knowledge and understanding!

But are you equipped to handle it? You have to get in the habit of denying yourself! You can’t just jump out one day and do it cold turkey and expect it to work! Build yourself up to it! The disciples had to be trained and conditioned and we have to be that as well!

Being a follower of Christ doesn’t happen overnight! Yes you can make the decision to be His follower; but you have to learn how to continually walk with him; while everything else is being thrown at you. People talking about you; how did Jesus respond! People lying on you; how did Jesus respond? People attempting to sabotage you and try to get you off track; how did Jesus respond?

Get in your Bible!! Get your mind focused on what His word says; you will be equipped and ready for battle! “You’re never going to amount to anything; nobody wants you”. I’m blessed and highly favored! “You’re not going to be able to afford that; you just need to stay where you’re at.” “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)

“Since you been going to that church you been acting like you better than somebody”; “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

Do you want to be a disciple? Are you ready and willing to follow Him? Do you have the ability to pick up your cross; lay down your fleshly desires and walk with Him?

The disciples left their homes, their families, their livelihood, their hopes and dreams, their selfishness and walked with Jesus!! But guess what they got so much more than anything they could’ve thought of or imagined! What God has for us; is always going to be bigger than what YOU see; what YOU can touch…But you’ll have to give it all up to walk with Him. What you get in return will change YOUR LIFE…

Are You Fit for the KINGDOM OF GOD?

All scripture referenced can be found at

http://www.biblegateway.com

Written/ published by Tamara McCarthy

©2019 Copyrighted

Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/author_tamaramccarthy

Check out my podcast on https://anchor.fm/tamara06 or

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/single-mom-of-purpose/id1446968952?mt=2&uo=4 or https://www.google.com/podcasts?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9hbmNob3IuZm0vcy84MmM2MTM4L3BvZGNhc3QvcnNz

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

#SpiritualSundays: Don’t Be Like This World..

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is —his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2 (NIV)

We aren’t to act like the world! How they act isn’t how we (Christians) should act!! When we give our lives back to God; we are to become a new creation! You shouldn’t be acting or doing things your “old self” was doing. We aren’t perfect! Never will be; but you want to follow the example that has been clearly laid out in the Bible for all of us.

You want to carry yourself differently; if you are used to fighting and having constant strife with folks. That has to change! The Bible tells us to turn the other cheek! It tells us to forgive and be forgiven!! You can’t expect to receive from God if you aren’t following His lead! We are instructed time after time; to be obedient. How can you lead if you don’t know how to follow?

We have to show others the way! How can we accomplish that; if we are walking down the same path that they are? Doing the same things that they are? Speaking the same way they are? Living our lives the same way; that they are?

We can’t fold to the ways of this world!! Jesus came so that we can have life! And have it more abundantly! We should be walking like we know and receive that!! He came to take the place of us for our sins! We should be turning away from all we’ve been doing and living a more free life! Free from the snares of the enemy!! The attacks won’t cease; but the hold he has over you will be released! You can’t walk away from something/someone that you are still in partnership with!! Break Free and renew your mind! Your soul! Your spirit! Your body! Receive God’s will for your life and go forth and show others the way…

Scripture reference can be viewed on http://www.biblegateway.com

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2019 Copyrighted

Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/author_tamaramccarthy

Check out my podcast on https://anchor.fm/tamara06 or

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/single-mom-of-purpose/id1446968952?mt=2&uo=4 or https://www.google.com/podcasts?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9hbmNob3IuZm0vcy84MmM2MTM4L3BvZGNhc3QvcnNz

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

#SpiritualSundays: Your Steps Are Ordered…..

“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps”. Proverbs 16:9 (NIV)

You know I didn’t have anything planned to write about today; and then I read this scripture! Wow, isn’t that amazing? I know I was amazed!

Does it make you wonder how it would apply to other things as well? You are getting ready to go hang out with friends and all of a sudden; they call and cancel on you. You got this amazing interview lined up; for what you think, is the perfect job and they send you a letter the day before saying: we have decided to go with someone more qualified!

How would that make you feel? Either situation at face value may suck and put you in a funk; but, look at it differently. Read that scripture again but this time more slowly and meditate on its every word. “In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps”. Proverbs 16:9

You were almost ready; on your way out the door but God had something else in mind for you! You called all your friends and family and told them about this interview, the company and all the money you would be making; but God has other plans for you!

Better is coming! The things that we hope and pray for can be our best in our minds but God can always go Higher, Bigger; and Better.

How do you feel when these type of situations take place? Do you talk about your friend to someone else? “Girl, I can’t believe she did me like that; I was all ready on my way out the door!” Dude, that man was talking about this party all week and all of a sudden; he gonna call and cancel on me? I wasn’t dressed yet but I was about to be!”

Sound familiar? After reading and meditating on that scripture; do you feel any different? Will you think differently next time? I will assure you there will be a next time! Learn the lesson now and change your reaction to it!

Have you ever heard that saying “you learn something new everyday?” Well I’m here to tell you that is a true saying!

What I learned yesterday; but didn’t catch it until this morning! Is that God is always blessing us! It may not look or feel like a blessing at that moment but as you take the time and internalize it and think on it; you will catch the revelation.

We don’t know what God was blocking when he cancels out our plans. He could be saving our lives! Saving us from some type of hurt or pain! When you look at it this way; you change your thinking, your mindset, the outcome and your reaction to the situation and just thank him!

Thank you Lord for stepping in all those situations that we think are good but you see it as bad! Thank you for that phone call or letter that may seem like a negative but you turned it into a positive!

If you liked this blog post; check out my many others on my website. http://www.tamaramccarthyenterprises.com

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/kingdomgals

Ladies, Join my Facebook group: https://m.facebook.com/groups/274547549700921

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

Special Edition: The Sex Talk

Are you a parent?

Have you had the sex talk with your child or children?

How did it go? Did you find out anything you weren’t aware of? Were they already sexually active? Did they already have birth control (girls) Did they already have condoms on hand (girls and boys)?

If you haven’t had the sex talk with them; who do you expect to teach them or speak with them about it? The streets? Society? School? Peers? Absentee Parent?

Do you believe that when you have the talk with them; they will listen to what you have told them? Let’s face it our kids aren’t perfect and neither were we; but you want to prepare them for the outside world and all that it involves!

I never got the talk from my parents and I can say I wish they would’ve prepared me for that part of my life! I remember my mom telling me to not have a boyfriend until I was 18 with no other explanation. As a young girl I didn’t know what to expect and she just left me hanging. Okay you said don’t have a boyfriend until I’m 18; why not? We as parents have to speak up and tell our kids what happens when you go down that road.

1. You can get pregnant! You can get someone pregnant!

2. Date rape!

3. Domestic violence!

4. Sexually transmitted diseases!

5. Reputation!

The list goes on and on but you get the picture!

Even though I didn’t get the talk from my parents I didn’t want to repeat that cycle! I decided early on that I would have the talk with my kids and let them know what they were up against! I didn’t want them to go down the same roads I had traveled! But, even though you have that talk your kids may still stray because of their surroundings and the friends they have; etc. With all the technology, we have nowadays we as parents; also have to tell them how not to use that in a negative aspect as well! Sending x-rated pics, videos and messages! That can definitely land them in big trouble!

All we can really do is lay the foundation, plant those seeds and pray they listen, understand and do what’s right.

And if they happen to go down that road and the outcome isn’t positive then we have to acknowledge what they’ve done and help them learn from it!

So many young kids are having kids and they have no sense of direction or what to expect! So many young boys leave these young ladies to do it all on their own and it’s not right!

Parents if your son gets a young girl pregnant he needs to accept his responsibility! He was part of the problem; he needs to be a part of the solution!

The way I told my boys and my daughter; “you see how I’ve struggled to provide for y’all; you don’t want to repeat this cycle! Don’t be like me; be better than me!”.

It start with us! If not us then who?

Written and published by Tamara McCarthy

©2018 Copyrighted Tamara McCarthy Enterprises

Check me out on Instagram: http://instagram.com/singlemomofpurpose and http://instagram.com/kingdomgals

Join my Facebook group: https://m.facebook.com/groups/274547549700921

Check out my books on Amazon: https://bit.ly/author_tamara

And, if this is your first time on my blog let me introduce myself.

I wear many hats! I am a Kingdom Gal! I am a Jesus Chic! I am an Author, Writer, Motivator, Single Mom and Certified Life and Empowerment Coach! I am earning my Phd in Christian Counseling; so that I can continue my passion and purpose to inspire, motivate, empower and encourage young ladies and women to live a better life!

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read this post; it is greatly appreciated!

Special Edition: It’s My Anniversary: Single Mom of Purpose….

You know what? I’m happy! I’m Free! I’m excited about my life as a Single Woman and even more a Single Mom! My kids are such a blessing and amazing kids! They work my nerves; LOL, but they make me want to be the Best Mom possible!

This is My Story:

This month; this year marks 11 years that I decided to take a stand; and decided that my children and I mattered more than a superficial relationship; that I had been wrapped up in.

Have I looked backed? Of course; and you know what I realized? That I made the best decision possible!

I was a Single Mom then; and I continue to be one today; it’s hard but I continue to press because I know God is with us!

We’ve never wanted for anything along this journey that God didn’t provide! Always had shelter, food, water, clothes; the necessities anything else is and was a blessing!

So many women think they can’t make it without a so-called man (a grown boy) so they settle and years later regret that very decision! I didn’t want to continue down that road; that bump in the road!

You see staying with him; allowing him to mistreat me, disrespect me and my children; wasn’t going to be a lifetime option for me!

I wouldn’t, I couldn’t; stand before you now as The Single Mom of Purpose….I am because God says I am..He and only He holds the keys to my Life…My Destiny…

Being single at times isn’t fun; and it’s hard work being a Single Mom! But, when you know that Greater is Coming! Baby, you look here; I’m ready and equipped to take on whatever trial and tribulation I have too and push through to that Blessing on the other side….

This is my Truth; what’s yours? Be unafraid! It took me sometime to find my voice; but know that I have…..

©️2018 Tamara McCarthy Enterprises (Special Edition: Single Mom of Purpose)

Check out some of my books over on Amazon.com

Single Moms You Aren’t Alone: Becoming a Single Woman of Purpose (Volume 1) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1518658121/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_LhDDAbCPR4PQJ

The Single Woman Chronicles: God, Men & You (Volume 1) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1532881398/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_cjDDAbYT2S3WS

Kingdom Gals: I Was Robbed…

Have you ever been robbed? Did they take something of value? How did you cope? Where the items replaceable? The value of what was taken was priceless; this wasn’t something you can put a price tag on!

What if what they stole; you couldn’t get back? How would you deal? How did you deal?

I was robbed over 30 years ago and it took me a little over 20 years to be healed from it!

One day walking home from school my best friend asked me to walk her home. Earlier that morning my mother had told me to come straight home. Now I don’t remember any other day where my mother told me to come straight home ( this is why as children; we are told in our lives and also in the Bible to obey our parents). But being the helpful and caring person I was born to be and always putting others before myself I thought nothing of it; and in an instant disobeyed my mother’s instruction! (The enemy knows our very weakness; even if it’s looked upon as a strength he uses it to his advantage!)

That very disobedience changed my life and snatched my childhood from my young hands!

My friend was afraid of her neighbor and his friends; we all went to the same school; so there was nothing that went off that screamed danger. Once getting to her house I knew I still had a ways to go to get home; and I asked her if I could use her phone to call my mom. She declined; her dad was home and he was very strict and she didn’t want to get in trouble.

No mind you I had just disobeyed my mother’s instructions to help her; but she couldn’t help me! Again, children this is why you should obey your parents! Friends come and go, they will use and discard of you once they get what they want! Your parents even though they may be strict and mean sometimes are doing that because they want to protect you!

Do you know how many times I played that day over and over in my head? If I would’ve just went straight home! If I would’ve just listened to my mom! If I would’ve put myself first and not my friend (or so I thought)!

As I left her house I didn’t get too far because I had my first run in with the enemy! Do you know that the enemy will choose whomever he wants to do his dirty work? There are many willing participants he has to choose from even children! When we don’t step up as parents that opens up the doorways for the enemy to have access to your children! When women are busy chasing after grown boys and they have children at home who need them; the enemy has endless access to them! Television, video games, text messages, phone calls, computers, neighbors, others kids, and the World Wide Web!

The same boys that she was afraid of approached me and took my book bag. Words were exchanged back and forth; I told them that my mom had just given me that bag and I needed it back! I’m not sure how long this went on for but in order for me to get it back; I had to now go into the neighbors house to get it. Still no red flags were raised, I was very naive and thought we were all friends since we went to the same school.

Once I stepped into that house I then saw that it was a very bad idea! Why didn’t I go home and get my mom; so her and my dad could go back for my book bag? Why did I think I was strong enough to do this on my own? I knew nothing of enemy territory; I didn’t know it wasn’t a place for a child to think she could be in control!

That day I not only was robbed of my childhood but my virginity! Of neither I can never get back and that ordeal began the downward spiral that was my life for years to come.

I wanted my life back! I wanted to reclaim my time! I wanted to live again! For so many years I was lost and broken! I didn’t know who I was; I was dealing with an identity crisis! But that was then! I lived through one of the worst times in my life and I want to tell you; that you can too!

My name is Tamara McCarthy! I am the Single Mom of Purpose on Instagram, I am a self-published author, I am a writer and blogger! I am a Single Mom and I am a child of the Most High God!! And I am loved. I no longer let or allow other people’s words of negativity have power over my life! I take back every single thing the enemy stole from me!! I am Free.

©️2017 Copyrighted Material Tamara McCarthy Enterprises (Kingdom Gals Series)

#SpiritualSundays Let Me Show You The Ways: Guest Blogger Ms Angie Bee

How many different ways can you show love to someone?  Well, during the holiday season we show love by giving lavish gifts, or inviting others over for a fabulous meal.  There are others that give money or make travel plans, and others simply enjoy time off “work”.

I get excited when I hear that people go through transitions during holiday seasons.  Babies are born, folks get engaged or married and others leave us to go live in heaven.  My mom moved to heaven on the Monday after Thanksgiving in 1999 and I love her for that…

Now, let us talk about hospitality during the holiday season.  Now THAT can be a challenge for some families!  Not only do you have to cook for the multitudes, but in some cases you need to clean up and decorate your guest room to accommodate out of town guests.  Money needs to be spent, arrangements need to be made and grumbling can be heard. “Why do I have to give up my room to Uncle Charlie?” “It’s too hot to sleep on the porch!”  “Your flight arrives at WHAT time?!”  The complaints can be heard far and wide!

This may be a stretch for some of you but what about those women that give up their babies to another family during the holidays?  That must be an incredible feeling… to receive a new member of your family from a “perfect stranger”?  WOW!  What an amazing gift of love!  I know that my eldest daughter was born a week before Thanksgiving in 1990 and MAN we had a lot to be grateful for that year!  WOW!

I love God, and I really mean what I say.  He gave us an entire book of love and called it The Bible.  It’s filled with instructions for our lives to make our time on Earth easier to bear.  God’s book is filled with true love stories – like the story that tells us that he sent His ONLY son to be born, to live and to die for US!  I wouldn’t give ANY of my children to ANYONE else for ANY REASON!  I mean, I appreciate my fellow man but YOU CAN’T HAVE MY CHILDREN!  Hmmph   God loved us more than I can imagine, and He sent His only son for us.  That’s love.

God also taught us how to show love to others!  His word teaches us in

1 Peter 4:9-10 ESV  – Show hospitality to one another without grumbling. As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace:

Hebrews 13:2 ESV – Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.

1 Corinthians 13:8 ESV – Love never ends…

Love and Hospitality go hand-in-hand during the holidays.  Don’t forget that friend or neighbor that showed you love in the past?  They could have been an Angel!  Now, go be an Angel to someone else this holiday season and show them your hospitality.  Be grateful for your life, your health, your family and for our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ that was born, lived, died and was resurrected JUST FOR YOU!

@2017 Copyrighted Material Evangelist Angie Bee used with permission for Tamara McCarthy Enterprises (Spiritual Sundays series)

 

Evangelist Angie BEE

Author, Producer, Promoter and Servant of the Lord

Call us today at 407-914-6519

www.DaQueenBee.com

Audio Book Production Specialists

“Bringing Your Words To Their Ears”

2012 Female Radio Show Host of the Year 

Recognized by the global One Accord DJ Alliance

2014 Ordained as an Evangelist by

Fellowship Church of Praise of Volusia County 

2015 recipient of the Outstanding Ministry Leader Award

for our Moms-n-Ministry Workshop

Presented by the Professional Women of Excellence, Inc.

 

2016 recipient of the prestigious “Palm Tree (Endurance) Award”

Presented by Mary & Martha Ministries, Orlando

 

April 2017 recognized as an Amazon #1 Best selling author by

Melanie Bonita Enterprises for contributing to the book

Daily Dose of Direction for Women In Business

 

Author, Media Producer, Promoter & Motivational Speaker

View our past events, commercials, VIDEO NEWS segments

and TV show episodes at

www.YouTube.com/AngieBEEpresents 

 

Purchase your Kindle copies of my books:

“Last Week… I Wanted To Die”

Evolution of Da Queen Bee” and 

“In The Beginning there was God, Me & You”

 

Visit us online today at

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Then I heard the Lord asking, 

“Whom should I send as a messenger to this people? 

Who will go for us?” I said, “Here I am. Send me.” – Isaiah 6:8

 

BEE Blessed!

 

Spiritual Sundays: Broken but Alive

Have you ever had something break in your life and thought at that time you would surely die? It was the end of your world; there was no coming back?

Well I’m here to tell you dry those tears; get your mind and thoughts in check and move forward! Climb that mountain! Cross that river! Ride that cloud! And just rejoice!

Everything that seems like it’s your worst day can turn into the best life lesson and motivation that you need to reach your next level!

When Jesus told Peter to get out the boat; did Peter say no or did he get out? Yes he took his eyes of Jesus for a mere second but he knew that without Jesus he couldn’t do it! (Matthew 14:22-33)

When God told Noah to build the Ark, did Noah say nope just let me and my family go down like everybody else? No, he got to working and building! (Genesis 6:1-22)

When Adam trusted Eve more than he did God and was banished from the Garden; did he give up and say I’m done and just whither away? No, he still went on to live and multiply in the Earth! (Genesis 3:1-23)

Abraham and Sarai: she felt empty and broken and would’ve rather given her husband to another woman than to wait on God! (Genesis 16:1-15; Genesis 18:1-15)

What have you done in your season of brokenness that would appear out of order? Did you go out and react on your own or did you wait on God? Many times there are lessons, healing, revelations, clarity, marching orders, quiet time, etc; in the midst of your brokenness!

This past week I slipped and fell trying to prevent an even bigger disaster from happening and ended up breaking my ankle and my foot! As I went down I knew something was wrong and on my own I couldn’t fix it; as my brother rushed to my side he immediately began to comfort me and reassure me it wasn’t as bad as it looked; I was going to be fine! (At first glance, rush of pain and the sound of something breaking; I was sure my leg was broken and my heart just dropped)

Long story but here’s the short version; yes I broke two areas that I needed to effectively stand up and proceed to walk into the life that God has designed for me. But, somewhere in the midst He requires us to rest and recharge ourselves!

You see we always think of the bad and not the in between! Yes, for me this may look like a set-back but in God’s eyes He is preparing me for something so big and so awesome that He knew I would need time to adjust! (Genesis 2:2, Matthew 14:23, Luke 6:12, Luke 5:15-16, Mark 6:31, Mark 1:35)

Where in your life are you feeling broken?

What areas do you feel you can work on?

How can you get past the thoughts of brokenness?

Have you tried to pray and ask for guidance and clarity?

Don’t rush the process. Use this time wisely and figure out what You need to do! Whatever the situation look at the bright side of it! In the in-between is where you will find your answers and solutions!

Written and Published by Tamara D McCarthy for Spiritual Sundays series (Tamara McCarthy Enterprises) © 2017 Copyrighted Material

Website: http://www.tamaramccarthyenterprises.com

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Coaching needed?

Contact me @ singlemomofpurpose@gmail.com

Have a book you are ready to birth?

Life has you lost in translation?

Feeling broken?

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Do you have lots of questions and no answers?

All of these situations and more require assistance; is a Coach required? Reach out today…

listen to my podcast by clicking here:

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Kingdom Gals: “Why Me, God?” Guest Blogger-Tanisha Shanee

Growing up I knew I was different. From daycare, I did not care to go outside and play with my classmates, I was in the books and practicing my penmanship. I was in pursuit of finding “It”. Now, what was it? I did not know, but I was looking for it. I knew there was something I needed to achieve and even at the young age of 3, I was looking for it. So this made school very easy for me because I figured whatever I was looking for was in one of those textbooks. Man… was I wrong. LOL.

I can laugh about it now, but I do wish I understood where it was a lot longer because it would’ve saved me a lot of student loan debt – I finished high school at 16, graduated college at 20, got my MBA, and is 99% completed with my PhD – I am a ABD (all but dissertation). See, I spent my life thinking if I learned more in school I would find happiness, the answer to what I was looking for, and high recognition. But, after every completion of a degree or milestone I still felt like, “Nope, that wasn’t it.”

People never understood why I was so depressed and attempted suicide several times in my life. I was getting very annoyed with trying to figure out why despite having everything that people classified as being successful, I was still incomplete. None of that stuff seemed to matter. This was so frustrating.

In 2012, I started my weight loss journey and when I tell people, it was so unexpected how things turned rapidly in my life See, I cried out to God because I needed His help to lose the weight. I was tired of the many failed diet attempts, the expensive weight loss products, and the memberships I never used. I needed something that would help me change my mind and I guess I would give God a try. But, see God has his own plan and the more you listen to what He presents, you will find yourself trying to figure out, “Well, how in the heck did I end up here?”

2016 was definitely a trigger year. God was sitting directly in my face and was making me very uncomfortable. Here I was receiving so many “downloads” and they were heavy. God was sending me to scripture and I was being told to “release it.” I did not understand why me? I was not a preacher or minister, so why was God sending these messages to me? One day I came across a Pastor from California on Periscope and he said to me, “You cannot run from who you are. God will use anyone, so accept it.” It was so strange because society told me otherwise, but I had to trust God because He did not stop sending the messages, so that meant something, right?

But, despite feeling uncomfortable and not qualified, I felt peace – a peace I never felt before. Had I found it? Did I reach the destination that I was looking for all my life? The wisdom that I was told I had from a child was starting to make sense – it was wisdom from the Lord. God was giving me downloads since I was a child. But, like any other uncomfortable destination, I was worried about this because I was encountering situations that I could not describe; therefore, I wouldn’t tell people. Like random strangers reaching out to me on Facebook asking me to pray for them because “God told me to come to you.” Even though I did not feel comfortable praying with them, I did and they experienced healing. WHAT? Come on, God, you cannot do that? But, I had to accept God can do all things and He will use who He wants to use.

One day I asked God a bold question, “Why did you give this to me? Was this what I sought after all these years?” I imagined my destination would look a lot different. I had accepted that I was a teacher, so I embraced that. I thought I would be a dean at a college, but I guess God said, nope… You’ll be another type of educator.

It is not easy, but every time I release a message from the Lord, I just let it be. When God tells me to do something, I just do it. I understand what when I show up and help someone or speak, I am bringing someone closer to God. When I do not know the person I must give a message to, I no longer think that I am a weirdo because it could be the answer they have been waiting on. When I am sent someone to speak, I know to invite the Holy Spirit with me on that stage because when He does, it is bound to turn the place out – literally.

If you are wondering why you too, don’t. Embrace the calling on your life. Allow God to use you in the manner and way He desires. You are more qualified to complete the mission. You are not a weirdo nor strange – you are gifted and wonderfully made. Get to that destination and get there quickly because the sooner you accept who you are, the people that need you will be able to reach their greatest potential – you are the missing piece.

Tanisha Shanee

Inspirational Speaker

2017 Copyrighted Material Used With Permission (Kingdom Gals Series)

Kingdom Gals: The Journey to Self-Confidence

Guest Blogger: Eniola Olaosebikan

Life is a journey, so is our self-confidence. It is a process that kicks off the moment we recognize the difference between right and wrong; and also the moment we become aware enough to compare our lives with that of others. It is termed a process because of its progressive nature. As a result, for every new phase of our lives, we will need an increase in confidence.

Our inability to build up confidence per time results into low self-esteem; all because we insist on using the confidence of a previous phase to handle a brand new, and at that- higher phase. This in a way can be likened to a teenager insisting on sleeping on his cot, despite his grown age. To dig deeper into self-confidence as a journey rather than just a phase in our lives or something we possess once and for all, it will be good to start with knowing what self-confidence is.

Self-confidence refers to the way we view or see ourselves. It is what we see to be the reflection of us when we look or think about ourselves: It is our inner self reflected back to our outer self.It is something we must learn and adapt to basically on our own.

In as much as factors and people may sometimes contribute to it, the bulk of the work lies on us. That is why it is called self-confidence and not people-confidence. It has to come from a place on the inside.

If self-confidence is our basic duty to carry out, how then do we generate it?

1. Spending time with God

How beautiful is it when the maker of a thing tells the product about itself? Wonderful, isn’t it? Who else can tell it better than the maker itself; the one who foresaw it, saw how good it would be and decided to create it based on the goodness formed in his heart?

The strongest form of confidence is the one we gain from the Lord- either through His Word spoken to us or the one written to us. Spending time with God as a Christian is necessary for a healthy self-worth and a great inner strength.

Spending time with God is like an exchange.  God gives us more of Himself even as He takes away (through processes) our inadequacies. The more time we spend with God, the more we get to know and discover ourselves. God exposes who we are to us (both who we are at the moment, and versions of who we were originally created to be) when we spend time in His Presence. Spending time with Him aligns us to His intent for us upon creation.

A look at the life of David, spending time with God gave him the inner strength to defeat all that needed to be defeated in his lifetime. It gave him the strength to kill bears and lions with his bare hands, and also imparted in him the knowledge to slay a man like Goliath who was not only higher than him in height, but also in battlefield experiences. Come to think of it, David was only a little boy when he defeated Goliath, how did He come about such confidence and boldness even as a little child? It was sure through spending time with God and God revealing who He really is to him on the inside, a factor that reflected not only in the way he saw himself but also the way he saw situations and related to people. His brothers, even the king at the time- Saul tried to dissuade him, but because of what He knew about God and himself, he knew he was well able and it was never about his stature or age. Self-confidence gained through spending time with God will make us defeat giants within and without.

Our self-confidence is never about what people think of us, but what we think of ourselves and the eyes through which we see ourselves. When we see ourselves through God’s eyes, we see ourselves right.

2. Spending time with ourselves

Spending time with ourselves enables us to know ourselves in possible details and the areas in which we need help/change. It helps us pay utmost attention to ourselves. Spending time with ourselves places the focus on us for better reasons; we are able to decipher who we really are away from the crowd.

When we spend time alone, we gain insights into the opinions we have of ourselves; such opinions we can easily divide into good or bad and therefore decide the ones which stays and the ones which goes.

Quite a number of people know nothing about themselves, and so, talk cheaply about themselves because they’ve not taken enough time to think about themselves and mirror who they truly are.

They simply absorb other people’s opinions (both negative and positive) about them without internally challenging them to see if that is really who they are.

Spending time with ourselves is simply paying attention to ourselves, especially our inner yearnings, opinions, desires and needs per time. It enables us to be sensitive to ourselves and our needs.

Spending time with ourselves also makes us know what soothes us and what doesn’t. It makes us fight our battles in our own skin and not someone else’. This can be seen in the life of David when Saul- the king offered him his armor. David was able to reject the armor because he knew himself duly and what he could work in.

In the end, knowing ourselves will save us from a lot of pain, shame and abuse.

3. Cultivating a reading culture

Reading opens us up and adds wisdom to us provided the right books are read.  It widens our views about life. Reading makes us grow in areas we should grow and as a result, prevents us from making mistakes that would have been made. With reading, we really don’t have to get to our old age before we begin to ooze out wisdom and act based on it.

Reading is a seed sown that grows up as a giant tree- a tree of wisdom. It literarily places a ladder at our feet; making us see wider and better. It gives us a better view of life- a much wider view and it sharpens our knowledge of good and bad. It also helps us to efficiently separate needs from wants without comparing our lives to others to determine what is needful.

Reading takes us through time and brings us wisdom. It deposits into our present the wisdom we would have gained in our old age through experience. It gives us an edge of time and the opportunity to maximize it. Besides, knowledge is the vehicle through which we travel through time to gain wisdom. Reading great books provides such experience.

4. Developing our skills.

There’s such confidence that comes out of knowing one’s value. When we know who we are and what we as individuals can offer, we will not be easily threatened (if at all we will be) by other people- especially their successes. The better we get at our skill, the more confident we become. Honing our skills and using them right contributes to our self-worth in the long run.

Conclusively, to see ourselves right, we have to be committed to the life we live. We have to be intentional to live our lives the way God intended and expects. We don’t have to be perfect to live in confidence, we only have to be receptive to God’s Word and committed to spending time with Him; and also pay attention to ourselves (especially our innermost self), and cultivate a learning culture such that will give us needed wisdom per time and help hone our skills to such level where only the best version of ourselves stares at us in front of the mirror per time. We also have to know that self-confidence is a continuous journey, never a phase. Just like our apps and gadgets, we have to keep updating it per time lest it goes out of ‘fashion’ and we find ourselves lacking in confidence once again. Different level of confidence is needed for different phases, and as a matter of fact, the higher the phase, the higher the confidence needed and required. So, it’ll be helpful to see ourselves as a constant work in progress and be willing to do all we can to become a finished work.

P.S: Only death makes us a finished work, so, till we die, we keep striving to keep ourselves upgraded!

2017 Copyrighted Eniola Olaosebikan used with Permission for Kingdom Gals Series